Snot true, I tell yer…

A funny thing happened to me today at the pool. When I swim, I spend most of my time diving and returning to the surface. In that time - duh - my pipes fill up with water so have to be cleared when I can breathe again. At some stage I popped up and caught a lady's arm. I apologised but noted she gave me such a withering look I thought I'd better swim off.

I saw her later in the steam bath, where she spoke to me: "Could I ask you not to clear your nose in the pool as it's absolutely disgusting". I stayed calm, told her not to worry and said it was only water, the same water which had entered my nose when I dove. "Only water. Really?" "Yes" I replied, "but I appreciate how you may think it was snot. Rest assured, it's not". She then said she'd seen some people rinsing off their flip-flops in the pool and was sure she wasn't alone in finding that utterly repulsive, too. She was slowly outing herself as pretty anally retentive, but not wishing to pour oil on the fire, I kept shtumm. After all, if you could see how clean the pool and its environs are…She finished off by saying "It's not personal", to which I replied I damn well hoped it wasn't, seeing as she didn't know me from Adam and left it at that. She left the steam bath almost immediately and left the pool just as I was returning about ten minutes later, presumably unable to cope with the ambient filth any longer. If I see her again I'll invite her to take a dip in an urban French pool and see how long she lasts. I also wonder if I'll see her again here…